**THE HISTORY OF BOTS: HOW IT BEGAN

Started by RUFFIAN, April 30, 2017, 09:40:00 AM

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RUFFIAN

 
                         


   Once Upon A Time ....
An Idea Formed in the Mind
  Of A Frisky Feisty Feline
     The Kind U Rarely Find

Because Of her Love for Horses
She Created A Game To Play
   They Came From Far & Wide
       To See If It Would Pay

Some Came And Ran And Conquered
   Some Went Away In Tears
      So Now We Will Acknowledge
         The Winners Of The Year


  ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   


GOOD EVENING -&- WELCOME TO THE 2018 MEOW MIX AWARDS
       HONORING THE BEST OF THE BEST -- AS WELL AS
SOME INTERESTING OTHER BOLDLY BIZARRE 'CAT-A-GORYS'
           
     OUR CAT-STRAVAGANZA IS COMING TO YOU FROM THE
SAN DIEGO ZOO AMPHITHEATER WHICH SEEMS HARMONIOUS
     AND SIGNIFICANT WITH THE THEME OF THE EVENING:

                            ***WILD KINGDOM***



ALL 'PRESENTERS' MAY MEOW, BARK, CHIRP, GROWL, SQUEAK
     HOWL, HOOT, WHINNY, QUACK, BUT NO HUMAN-SPEAK
         TRANSLATORS WILL BE ON STAND-BY IF NEEDED
                 FOR SOME NOT AS VOCAL AS OTHERS   
       
                 
NOW PLEASE GIVE A RESOUNDING WELCOME TO OUR CO~MC's
        ~~ MISS PIGGY -&- KERMIT ~~       
       
               
         
''O THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE STANDING OVATION
    I'M SURE IT IS ALSO FOR MY DEAR 'KERMIE'
      WHO MAY NOT BE AS BODACIOUSLY BEAUTIFUL
            OR AMAZINGLY AWESOME AS MOI ~  BUT
HE IS IN HIS OWN WAY A SUPER STAR OF GIGANTIC PROPORTIONS
                       {IF ONLY IN HIS MIND!}   :lmao:
                 
KERMIT IS SUFFERING A BIT OF LARYNGITIS 
    SO I MAY BE SPEAKING
A LOT MORE OFTEN THIS EVENING
BUT HE WILL BE BY MY SIDE OFFERING
SOME 'FROGGY' INSIGHTS ALONG THE WAY"

WITHOUT FURTHER QUIRKY COMMENTARY
    PLEASE TURN YOUR ATTENTION TO
THE SILVER STUDDED SPARKLE CARPET
WHICH MAY DULL IN COMPARISON TO
THE SPARKLING STARS OF THE 2018 SEASON .... 
               


PLEASE WELCOME OUR SHINING STARS OF 2018 ....
   LEADING THE PURRRFOUND PURRRCESSION ARE
     OUR CO-REIGNING 2017 HORSE OF THE YEAR:

:lightbulb:  **DUSTY -&- TIGER DANCER**  :lightbulb:
                                                                       
**THEIR OUTSTANDING ACHIEVEMENTS MAY BE VIEWED
ON THE OFFICIAL 2017 MEOW MIX AWARDS PRESENTATION**

RUFFIAN ~ aka: The Cheetah {2016 HOTY}

REAL QUIET {2015 HOTY}

CATALINA {2014 HOTY}

CIGARSHOP

POST TIME MIKE

BLUNNY ~ aka: The Energizer-Blunny / Bunny

PEEPTOAD

RAVEN

THUNDER CAT

CRUZAN

EL PRADO

ROAMIN ~ Welcoming Our Newcomer Colt With Open Paws!!
  :hug:

     ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~


WE NOW BEGIN OUR AWESOME AWARDS CAT-STRAVAGANZA!

PLEASE WELCOME TO THE STAGE OUR FIRST PRESENTERS
PRESENTING: THE DISTORTED HUMOR AWARD
                      ~HECKLE + JECKLE~

2 FINE FEATHERED FRIENDS WHO KNOW A BIT ABOUT HUMOR
                   
      A DOUBLE FEATHERED THANK YOU, MISS PIGGY ~

THE DISTORTED HUMOR AWARD IS
      EXACTLY WHAT THE NAME IMPLIES
'HUMOR' IS SUBJECTIVE AND WHAT SOME MAY FIND
             HILARIOUSLY BELLY-ROLLIN FUNNY
OTHERS MAY NOT 'GET IT' OR NOT CONSIDER HUMOROUS

WE HAVE 3 HONOREES FOR THIS AWARD BECAUSE EACH
  BRING A DIFFERENT 'FLAVOR' OF DISTORTED HUMOR
PLEASE GIVE A RESOUNDING APPLAUSE, CAWS, CHIRPS
          FOR OUR 3 HUMOR AFICIONADOS:
   BLUNNY ~ RUFFIAN ~ TIGER DANCER
               
                       

                    THANK U HECKLE + JECKLE! 
SOME TOP QUALITY BIRD SEED IS IN YOUR DRESSING ROOM
                 


''OUR NEXT AWARD IS THE ''LOST IN THE FOG''
             
THIS AWARD CAN EITHER DESIGNATE A WIN WITH
   THE LOWEST $$$ EARNED ~ OR SOMEONE ARRIVING
AT THE STARTING GATE TOO LATE TO ENTER -&- GETS D.Q.

     TO PRESENT THE 'LOST IN THE FOG' AWARD
PLEASE WELCOME:
        ~RUDOLF THE RED NOSE REINDEER~

BECAUSE IF ANYONE CAN FIND SOMEONE 'LOST IN THE FOG'
                  HE CERTAINLY CAN AND WILL!
{OUR SPECIES TRANSLATOR WILL CONVEY HIS DEER-SPEAK}

THANK YOU MISS PIGGY -&- KERMIT FOR THE WARM WELCOME
               

OUR LOST IN THE FOG HONORABLE MENTION GOES TO
                 ~DUSTY~ WITH A $44.70 VICTORY

AND THE TROPHY GOES TO OUR WINNER
               ~THUNDER CAT~
WITH A GRAND TOTAL WIN OF: $43.20 ON 5/30
           

     ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~ 

COME ON KERMIT, YOU 'PRECIOUS' LIL FROGGY! MWAAAAH! KISS KISS
                 
   THIS ONE IS ALL YOUR'S CAUSE U ARE SUCH A PRECIOUS

            "RIBBOT RIBBOT RIBBOT" -- TRANSLATION =
    THE NEXT AWARD IS: ''THE PRECIOUS''

THE 'ONE RING TO RULE THEM ALL' IS A BIT DIFFERENT HERE
   ''THE PRECIOUS'' = THE 'RING BEARER' IS BASED ON
                     THE FINAL TOP 4 IN A CONTEST:
#1 BRIDE / #2 BRIDESMAID / #3 FLOWER / #4 RING BEARER
     ''RING BEARER'' RELATES TO FRODO / LOTR / GOLLUM

HONORABLE MENTION GOES TO: ~CIGARSHOP~ WITH 13

OUR 3-PEAT WINNER OF THIS AWARD: ~BLUNNY~
THE 'ENERGIZER-BLUNNY' SOMEHOW FOR 3 STRAIGHT YEARS
MANAGES TO HOP HIS WAY INTO THE 4th PLACE SPOT!
THIS YEAR HE HAS DONE IT AGAIN WITH 18 GOLDEN RINGS!

                         

     ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~ 

OINK OINK OINK ~ THE PERFECT ONE IS BACK
           

OUR NEXT AWARD IS:
THE 'CAT HOUSE' CATNIP TROPHY

HERE TO PRESENT THE AWARD IS THE ONE ... THE ONLY 
          ~MS GRUMPY CAT~
~ ~ ~

''YEH YEH YEH ~ HUMBUG AND MRRRROW MRRROW MRRRROW
OK, I'LL LEAVE MY GRUMPATUDENESS FOR A FEW MINUTES
     TO PRESENT THIS 'QUESTIONABLE HONOR' AWARD"
               

ENDING UP IN THE CAT HOUSE MEANS ---> LAST PLACE
   WHY THIS IS AN 'AWARD GETTER' IS BEYOND ME!
OF COURSE THE INCENTIVE IS A BATCH OF FRESH CATNIP ~
MEOW MIX + ANCHOVY BUFFET ~ AND OF COURSE
THE CHIPPENDALES ~ THE DANCERS = NOT THE RODENTS!

HONORABLE{?} MENTIONS: DUSTY = 13   CATALINA = 12
BUT ONCE AGAIN THE CAT HOUSE QUEEN -- WITH 21 TRIPS
TO THE COSMOPOLITAN ~ CHARISMATIC ~  CHARMING CAT HOUSE
           ~RUFFIAN~   WHO APPARENTLY NOW -&- THEN
LETS HER ''INNER-CHEETAH'' REMAIN BACK AT THE BARN TO SNOOZE   



     ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~


       THANK YOU MS GRUMPYNESS
AT FIRST I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE IT WAS YOU
       BECAUSE FOR A BRIEF INSTANT,
I THOUGHT I SAW A 'GRIN' AT THE WORD "RODENTS"  :lmao:
           


MOVING RIGHT ALONG,
    OUR NEXT AWARD IS
THE COUNTERPART TO THE CAT HOUSE:
  OF COURSE ===>  THE DOG HOUSE TROPHY!

PLEASE GIVE A 'WOOF-WOOF-WOOF' WELCOME TO
           ~DROOPY DOG~!!!
           

             ''THANK U MISS PIGGY + KERMIT
I KINDA FEEL A BIT OUT OF PLACE WITH MY ''CANINE-NESS''
AT THE 'MEOW MIX' AWARDS, BUT WITH THE WARM WELCOME
ATMOSPHERE I MUST ADMIT IT'S NOTHIN BUT PURRRRRFECT!

HONORABLE MENTION FOR THIS AWARD
GOES TO ~POST TIME MIKE~
        WITH JUST 5 DOG BONES!

BECAUSE THE RUNAWAY WINNER HAS A WHOPPING 17 STASHED AWAY ...
     THE INCENTIVES OF ....
A CASE OF MILK BONE BISCUITS + RAWHIDE CHEWS
PLUS LAS VEGAS SHOW GIRL FILLYS DANCE TROUPE
MUST HAVE BEEN ENOUGH FOR THIS CLEVER COLT STEALING 17 KEYS
                                  :OMG:
~CRUZAN~ COME ON UP TO GRAB YER 2018 DOG HOUSE KEY


                       
    ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~


OUR NEXT AWARD IS:  ~THE 'GOLDEN GOOSE EGG'~

        TO PRESENT THIS AWARD,
   LEAVING HIS COZY FEATHERED NEST
PLEASE GIVE A 'HONK-HONK' WELCOME TO:
~GLADSTONE GANDER~ A COUSIN OF DONALD DUCK
                   

            ''THANK YOU MISS PIGGY -&- KERMIT
IT'S A BIT DIFFICULT TO CALL THIS AN 'HONOR' BECAUSE
THE 'CHALLENGE' OF WINNING THIS YEAR END AWARD 
MEANS THE RECIPIENT MUST RUN AN ENTIRE DAY AND
RETURN TO THE BARN WITH $0 ~ NADA ~ EMPTY PURSE  :o  :(
           
NEEDLESS TO SAY, THE TRAINER + OWNER ARE NOT HAPPY!
           (?)HONORABLE MENTION(?)  GOES TO:
            ~CRUZAN~ (1)  and  ~RUFFIAN~ (1)


    BUT THEE GOLDEN GOOSE EGG TROPHY GOES TO:           
                     ~TIGER DANCER~ 
WITH 2 GOLDEN EGGS IN HER FINELY FEATHERED NEST''
                   


THANK YOU GLADSTONE GANDER FOR A 'HONKING' PRESENTATION

     
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

WE WILL NOW TAKE A BRIEF BREAK TO GRAB SNAX
    AND STRETCH ......
         LEGS, WINGS, EARS, TAILS, PAWS, CLAWS,
AND ANYTHING ELSE NEEDING A STRETCH   :thumbsup:



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MAY THE PURRRRRRRRRR BE WITH YOU
                      =^,,^=


" JOURNEY NOT UPON THE PATH OF ANOTHER
      LEST YOU ARRIVE AT THEIR DESTINATION ~
                     AND NOT YOUR OWN! 😔 "
              
    www.RUFFIAN333.com

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